Vietnam

*originally posted 22 November 2007

Better late than never, right? Anyhoo, here it is, piecemeal fashion. I only got through Ninh Binh (part deux) because after that came our “homestay” in the Mekong delta which really deserves a post of its own. What a crock of dog doo! But I digress–starting with the northern city of…

Hanoi

I don’t know. For some reason we weren’t as enthralled with Hanoi as most westerners we met were. Maybe we’re missing the HaNoi gene. And it’s not for lack of being ‘city people’ because we loved Saigon in the south, which is far bigger. Trying to put a pulse on exactly why we didn’t care much for it–Hanoi has the feel that it was once a quaint, small city that has now gotten so overpopulated, so chaotic, so overwhelming for its own good. The streets are too narrow for motos, cars, cyclos and pedestrians–why pedestrians? because they’re forced onto the streets as the sidewalks typically overflow with food carts, heaps of child-sized tables and chairs, clothes racks, inevitable big-city garbage and people just generally milling around. (hello? you want moto? 1 hours moto? moto? moto?) One memorable obstacle we had to skirt around once was a Vietnamese woman, sitting directly on the sidewalk (note I did not say "on a chair on the sidewalk”) chopping raw beef for her pho, probably. I wonder what the FDA would think about that…

So always traffic. Always horn-honking. Oh, there’s wonderful things about Hanoi–beautiful Hoan Kiem lake, the cathedral, the Temple of Literature. And we had the best food of our entire time in Vietnam there: first at KOTO (Know One Teach One) a restaurant entirely staffed by disadvantaged youth employed to learn hospitality skills–eating for a cause. 2nd the scrumptious cha ca at Cha Ca La Vong. We sat down here and were greeted with the waiter tossing us a laminated piece of paper reading: “We only serve 1 thing here. Fried fish. 70,000 dong.” (about $4.50) Bring it on! They brought over a pan atop coals, and the little fish pieces are already cooking in there; stern Vietnamese grandma instructed us to add noodles, greens, and herbs–parsley, lemongrass…so yummy!

3rd our transcendental bowl of pho chin at 49 Bat Dan street–a little dive that looked like and probably was someone’s garage. You grab your steamy gingery and cardamom-brothy bowl of deliciousness and sit down at the aforementioned pint-sized plastic tables and chairs. Then slurp away. Smile at the locals, who are staring at you. After all, we were taking pictures of our food–that is pretty damn weird. (Oh, & the coffee! Vietnamese caphe sua da is like…my dream coffee. It’s made with sweetened condensed milk. Sweetened condensed milk! Why hadn’t I ever thought about that? But I digress again. Forgive me; it’s so easy to get tangential when the subject of food comes up. At any rate, we didn’t mourn leaving Hanoi, as we have with other cities & places on this trip.

Sapa

We spent two fantastic (just absolutely fantastic to quote the Aussie couple we met on the train back to Hanoi) days in the mountain town of Sapa, northern Vietnam. I finally got to see, photograph, hike in and even fall into my beloved rice terraces–like step pyramids made of grass, the steep paddies have just been harvested last month. I can’t do the whole scene justice to describe how incredible (& how removed from anything seen in the U.S.) it all was to take in. We hiked wherever we could, down into the steep valley and returning to Sapa in the evening for yummy food (homemade pasta! no really, marmousch! but I’ll leave it at that.) The second morning we hired a guide to take us down into hilltribe villages where the Black H’mong and Red Dzao minorities live.

quick & dirty description of the hilltribes:

H’mong: are animists and worship spirits. Wear indigo-dyed linen clothing made from hemp (from which evolves a whole other story I don’t dare post). The women wear skirts, aprons, these cute footless leggings and cylindrical hats with the top of their head exposed, & heaps of silver jewelry. Heaps and heaps and heaps. They’re called black h’mong because of the predominant color of clothing.

Dzao: practice ancestor worship of spirits including sacrificing animals. They typically wear beautiful red dresses with these huge, red, puffy turban-like headpieces (more wide than long). Their long hair is shaved a bit above the forehead, as are their eyebrows, and the rest comes out of the turban’s top. Oh, we have the most beautiful picture of a gorgeous 23 years-old Dzao girl!
Onwards. We set off with our guide, name pronounced Hoom, & soon enough had two Black H’mong in tow, Mai and Cuu (later you buy from me? where you from? you buy from me? you buy from me?). We actually did buy from our little entourage–mostly because they end up guilting you into it with the rationale that they’ve dutifully followed you the entire hike so you’re absolutely a heartless bastard not to patronize them. At any rate, I figured karma had to come into play so we obliged. But honestly, I really didn’t mind having them with us. At one point after stopping to rest, I surprised myself by wondering, “Where’s Mai and Cuu? Are they still coming?” I should mention that the minute you do buy, not only do a flock of other hilltribe women come out of the woodwork (and now the ”you buy from me” line has turned into a repeated trancelike chant) but you’ll inevitably have at least two more women following as you resume walking. If you’re at all fazed by it you’ll want to throw yourself out of a window when it’s all said and done. But we took it in stride (the prices are still dirt cheap after all) and had a great time. Sapa is a gem in Vietnam.

*& if any of you are seeing us in the next 6 months, I beg of you–take note of the girly bracelet (given to him by Cuu) now on Steve’s left wrist and tease him until the cows come home. I can’t get him to take it off–not to shower, not to sleep, nothing. Tease. BE MERCILESS.