Happy Wednesday!

I had a wonderful day with my sidekick: some getting-ready-for-vacation errands (sunscreen: check!), carousel time, lunch date for Mexican food, and a refreshing nap together.

Since Mila is now acutely aware of the video camera we have to sneak it in. Here's one of my latest favorites. Steve and I had a good laugh over this one --who knows what she's looking for in those books. We'll likely never know.

What Happens When Dad is in Charge

Steve accompanied Mila to her 'Lil Kickers class one day last month, as he often does, and I got a phone call:

Steve: They're doing pictures. It's picture day.
Me: What? They didn't say anything about that last week.
Steve: Well, they are.
Me: Oh no. I'm missing it.
Steve: It's okay. Do you care what kind of prints we get? There's a lot of options.
Me: No. Whatever you think. Enough for grandparents too. Wait! Did you accessorize?
Steve: Accessorize?
Me: You know, cute socks, maybe legwarmers?
Steve: No. We don't have anything with us. It'll be fine.

Four weeks later...

We now have a poster. A freaking 20' x 30' poster. We also have a printed-directly-onto-the-canvas 12' x 16', a photo coffee mug, magnets, and every size print photograph you can imagine of this singularly amazing shot of our one and only Wugs.

I may have gone a little overboard, Steve said afterwards.
I love him even more now.

What a Mother's Day.

Gosh was I showered with abundant love on Mother's Day. I got to indulge in some of my favorite foods: toasted ham and swiss cheese bagels for breakfast, shawarmas, and this wonderful man I get to call husband thoughtfully surprised me by cooking my favorite meal, pasta bolognese. I think the world turns on pasta bolognese. Especially his.

Our swimming plans got cancelled because of weather so we just spent the day in the city instead. I went to my new-to-me favorite store, Madewell and bought a couple more things (which have since gone on sale, grrrrr). It's been so long since Steve and I have treated ourselves to some new threads (Mila is the best-dressed one in the house, but isn't that the way it always works?!) and it feels good to have some good, quality pieces to wear. When you look good you feel good, no? Although the most treasured thing I'll ever wear is my baby...I wore her in my Maya wrap yesterday and nothing makes me look better than her by my side. At Madewell they were giving out mini cupcakes to all the mothers; I split mine with Wugs because after all, without her I wouldn't be eligible for one. She appreciated the gesture.

We headed to Yerba Buena Gardens and took Mila on the carousel. She went nuts in all the right ways--at one point I said to her, Mila, you're on a horse! And she quickly corrected me, CAMEL! Sharp little lurky that she is. Since then whenever camels are mentioned Mila immediately reminds us that they're napping, because that's how we managed to tear her away from the carousel. At a nearby park she took off and climbed up the monkey dome rung for rung. Alone. I spotted from below because I'm a scaredy cat and didn't want to look like Crappy Mom on Mother's Day of all days, but she was just fine. The kid about whom I expressed concern to her pediatrician at her 15-month appointment because she didn't seem to be 'climbing enough.' (The pediatrician totally laughed at me.) Anyways. Thursday I get to cash in on the rest of my Mother's Day present...a spa morning from Steve.

Steve, you're the best.

All in all just a beautiful day with my loves and that's all I'll ever want. This motherhood gig is pretty sweet.

On being a Mama.

I've always wanted to be a Mama. Steve and I postponed it for a good long while but it was always there. When we have kids and not if. Mila arrived in the middle of one warm August night and our lives were forever changed for the better. For the best.

Being a mother is so raw. Second-guessing is elevated to an art form. Their pain is achingly yours, their happiness, joys, and triumphs fill your heart and suddenly you're blinking back tears and swallowing down lumps. You see their eyes dancing with smiles and know you're doing a good job. No matter what, you have her and she has you. It's a little window in time, I know that. All too soon Mila is going to have a life of her own, one where she doesn't depend on me for hugs, for kisses on the mouth, for kisses on the soles of her feet, for meals, for diaper changes, for twirling around in our living room. I will miss this season of my life.

And while I'm at it...to my own mother, the one who taught me everything without actually ever coming out and saying it. She lived it and showed me every day. She's been making sacrifices for her girls since before I was even born. I don't know what I would do without my Marmousch and I actually do still depend on her for hugs. Always will.

Tonight as I was kissing and hugging Mila goodnight I told her that no matter how many children come after her, she'll always be the one that made me a Mama. It's my privilege and honor to be the one to answer when she says that beautiful word. Mama. In urgent moments, in singsong-y moments, and all those moments in between.

Happy Mama's Day to those who have children, those who have lost children, and those still waiting to meet theirs.

Above is Mila, 1 month old.

Just tooling around in a paddleboat..

...Wugs in a life jacket. No big deal.

In the 6 months we lived in San Francisco, then another year in Napa, and now our 1 plus years in the East Bay area, I had never even laid eyes on Stow Lake. But I'd always heard about the paddleboats and rowboats for rent there and filed it away as something fun to do if you had a Wugs. We have a Wugs now (20 months later and I still can't believe it)! The other day we took a (sort of) spontaneous afternoon trip into the city, braved the thought of a shortened nap (the horror), and got on a little boat on a little lake in the middle of a tremendous city. Just three happy people, tooling around in a paddleboat.

• p.s. Don't let Mila's facial expression/body language fool you, she was very much into this whole thing.

Other sweet things around here:

• Wugs now says all of the cats' names, pronounced CUBBY (Chubby), FAHTTY (Fatty/Hoodes), and GIGI. 

• But when asked what her name is, she always says, "KICK."  

• Mila and I came home from errands yesterday to see a FedEx 'sorry we missed you' notice on the door. I said, "Aw, man" at the thought of having to schlep to some building to pick up my package. Hours later when we were leaving the house again, Mila quickly glanced at the door and exclaimed, "AW, MAN!

•  Today I discovered a new splash park near us. I think we'll be living there this summer. I plan on baking cookies for the lifeguard staff (maybe I'm kidding. maybe I'm not.).

• 20 days until our vacation!
• 14 days until our mini one! I knew May was going to be a good one.

Happy May.

I'm looking forward to May. We have a vacation waiting for us at the end of the tunnel that quite frankly is long overdue (like 2 years overdue) and both Steve and I are downright giddy at just the thought of it. A new adventure is going to do us all a world of good, I think.

In the meantime Mila and I will be searching for every water park, fountain, and pool that we can get our hands (and feet) on in this gloriously warm weather. Summer, please stay! Make yourself comfortable.

To the Monterey Bay Aquarium.

Another fun field trip. Today we drove south to Monterey and their gorgeous aquarium there. Favorite parts were the jellyfish experience exhibit (set to psychedelic music!), the seahorses, floor to ceiling oceanscapes that was better than any television show, and Steve's and my favorite--the giant octopus (at that point Wugs was practically falling asleep atop Steve's shoulders so she wasn't too impressed.)

I'm loving this stage of showing Wugs anything and everything, then seeing her awed reactions --and I know it's only going to get better...although, on the drive back home when I asked her what was her favorite part she replied, "dadas." Which is still her word for cats. Hmmm.